Portland Matchmakers Reveal the Real Reasons People Ghost

By Portland Singles Dating Service
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Out of all the things you can do to someone you’re starting to date, ghosting is one of the worst. But what is ghosting? And why do people do it?

The definition of ghosting in the dating world is the act of vanishing… ceasing all communication with someone for no apparent reason.

Ghosting occurs when two people that are currently talking or going out on dates disappears out of nowhere. One person vanishes without giving the other any kind of explanation, and it’s definitely harsh.

Apparently ghosting has become very popular in today’s dating scene, but does that make it right? Does it really soften the blow of a breakup? Is it really worth doing? Today, our Portland matchmakers will show you why ghosting has become a trend in today’s dating scene and why we’re against it.

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1. It’s easier than breaking up face to face.

It’s so much easier to just disappear rather than breaking up with someone face to face.

You don’t have to see them face to face or witness them burst out into tears because you don’t want to date them anymore. But even though ghosting has made it easier, our Portland matchmakers don’t support it. It is the coward’s way of letting someone go. Everyone deserves to know why someone doesn’t want to see them again. Just because something is easier doesn’t make it right. Think about it, would you want someone to ghost you? Wouldn’t you feel confused and hurt?

2. It has become efficient and timesaving.

Who has time to arrange a meeting just to break up with someone, right? This is what goes through many daters thoughts. People think it’s a waste of time to go out to lunch just to tell someone they don’t want to see them again, and this is a prime reason ghosting has become so popular.

People have stopped responding to messages, emails, and phone calls because it’s easier to just fade away. If you are someone who is known for ghosting, you must understand that you’re hurting people’s feelings. It doesn’t really take too much to pick up the phone and let them know you’re not interested in seeing them again. Ghosting, on the other hand, doesn’t allow the other person any kind of closure. It leaves them hanging and wondering what happened to you. You have to let them know why you don’t want to see them.

3. Because people don’t want to be mean.

Breakups are tough, and we know that very well. Breakups have always been hard, and before modern technology, people had to break up face to face, the conventional way. It sucked, but it needed to be done. Breaking up face to face allows for an honest conversation and closure.

Breakups can be messy, and there’s no denying that, which is why so many daters are ghosting and taking the coward’s way out. People will heal and forget a breakup that provided closure, but being ghosted leaves them wondering forever. What happened? Where did things take a wrong turn? And Why? What did they do wrong?

Many people tell themselves that ghosting is the best option to get out of seeing someone, but our Portland matchmakers know it’s only the coward’s way out. There’s no excuse for it and it should never replace a face to face conversation.

4. They have already met someone.

Here we go again, with people not wanting to be mean. It’s never easy breaking things off with someone, but disappearing with no explanation isn’t acceptable. If you don’t feel the same way for them, or you have just met someone new, you need to be honest about it and let them know rather than ghosting them. Believe us when we tell you that most people would rather hear an honest explanation. Okay, so you found someone else, perfect… let them know, but don’t leave them wondering about the what ifs or what they did wrong. They don’t deserve that—nobody deserves that.

How to Handle to Handle Being Ghosted

Okay, so you went out on a couple dates with someone and never heard from them again. You have written to them and called them, but you’ve not had any responses… He or she has vanished into thin air—they’ve ghosted you.

Unfortunately, you will never know what happened or why they just up and disappeared, but don’t worry about that. If they decided to leave you without giving you any kind of explanation or answers, they’re clearly immature. If you want to survive being ghosted, you must keep doing your own thing. If they vanished, that’s a reflection of themselves, not you. You are worthy and you must understand this. There are plenty of men and women out there who would love to date you for who you are. This person you went out with is clearly not someone you want to date anyway. If they can’t even give you a reason why they don’t want to date you, they’re not worth your time anyway. The fact that he or she didn’t want to put in any efforts and ran at the first sign of trouble is a huge red flag. And although you’ll never get your answer, don’t let it get you down. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back out there if you want to find love.

If you’re not meeting the right men and women on your own, it’s time to try something new. If you’re looking for real love in Portland, contact our Portland matchmakers today to reserve your complimentary matchmaking consultation. Let our dating experts introduce you to quality singles in Portland, singles who would never do something as shallow as ghosting.


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